The Decimation of Mae (The Blue Butterfly) Page 15

  “How are you feeling?”

  I stared at Pauline with bewilderment. She seemed more out of concept than the butterfly had.

  “Are you okay? You look a little pale.” She bustled over to me, placing the back of her hand on my forehead.

  Nothing seemed to work; my mind, my body, my senses, they were all frozen and slack. My mouth wouldn’t form words as I stared at her, the only thing that seemed to work was my eyesight.

  “Okay, honey,” she soothed as she directed me back against the mattress. “I’m going to fetch Dr Galloway. I’ll be right back.”

  I couldn’t nod, my brain wouldn’t tell my head what to do. My lungs still forced air in and out, my eyes still showed me what the world was up to, my nostrils still told me breakfast was cooking, yet my brain couldn’t seem to decipher any of the information these senses were detecting.

  I didn’t panic. I didn’t worry. I was too high on confusion to decode what was happening. The serenity that ran through me calmed any anguish that my sudden disability brought, taking away any fear that death portrayed.

  The birds sang even louder as though heralding my journey into heaven, their arousing song stunning and delightful.

  I managed a small smile as my eyes slid closed and I welcomed peace.

  ~~~

  “She’s deteriorating.”

  Master’s voice echoed through my head but my brain still refused to control any muscle or joint in my tired body. Exhaustion was the only thing I felt, although my senses were still aware. I could smell the subtle aroma of Master’s scent, his unique trace of citrus and mint mixed with his woody cologne. I could hear each word that was spoken, I could even taste whatever Pauline had cooked up that day but I was trapped inside a frozen body; a useless form, a living corpse.

  “Yes, I’m afraid she is.” Dr Galloway’s voice was filled with compassion and sadness as he replied to Master’s words.

  “How long does she have?”

  The doctor sighed, as though weighing up my life. “I’m not too sure. A week, maybe two.”

  Silence descended around me as anger controlled my thoughts. I thought the butterfly had told of my plea, that it had come to take me. But now I knew it had just been my tumour playing cruel tricks on my brain.

  “Will she remain this way… paralysed?” Master’s question caused my heart to speed up. I didn’t want to lose the ability to move in the last moments. I had refused treatment because of its debilitating symptoms.

  “No. Your father’s beating caused her brain to swell. That in itself is putting the tumour under some difficult strain. Once the swelling has subsided she should feel much better. Give her time to rest, Daniel. I’ll make her as comfortable as possible.”

  “Yes.”

  I tried to frown at the small squeak in Master’s voice but of course, I couldn’t.

  “I…” The doctor paused, deliberating his words. “There’s something special about this one?”

  A suffocating atmosphere suddenly descended, filling the air with a thickness that my lungs struggled to cope with. “Special?”

  “Forgive me if you think I’m being forward Daniel but… I can’t understand why you seem to care. She’ll be removed from your guidance soon. You educate and sculpt, then send them to the highest bidder, that’s how it’s always been. But this one seems to have…”

  “Enough!”

  “I’m being a friend here, not a colleague. Talk to me, Daniel.”

  “You can leave now.” Master was final in his words, the doctor sensed it as much as I did.

  “Fine,” Dr Galloway sighed. “But be careful, Daniel. Your father will make you both pay for any relationship you develop.”

  “There is no relationship, Philip. She is just… just the stock that has seen the highest bids.”

  The doctor scoffed and I could picture him shaking his head. “Sure.”

  Nothing more was said before the door clicked closed. I was sure I was alone until soft fingers brushed away a strand of hair that was tickling my nose. A physical sadness filled the air when Master sighed heavily. I tried so hard to open my eyes when his thumb stroked the length of my cheekbone and he repeated a sigh.

  But then he was gone, quiet once more enveloping me as sleep did the same.

  ~~~

  “You look much better.” Pauline smiled widely at me as I lifted another spoon of soup to my mouth. I gave her a small smile in return.

  I wasn’t sure how much more time had passed since I had overheard Master and the doctor’s conversation but I hadn’t heard or sensed him again after that.

  Pauline’s soup seemed to have miracle qualities, aiding me and building my strength with every swallow. “This soup is good, Pauline. Do you make it yourself?”

  She nodded as she pulled various clothes from the huge wardrobe. “Yes.” She smiled proudly. “It was my mother’s recipe. Chicken, celery and a secret item.”

  I laughed with her. “Well it’s wonderful. Thank you.”

  She gave me a pained smile and I narrowed my eyes on her. “What?”

  She wrung her fingers furiously and took a deep breath. “Master requires your company with some visitors tonight.”

  “Oh.” I didn’t like the swoop of anguish in my stomach. Nerves and anxiety put me off my food and I placed the spoon beside the half-filled bowl. “Will it… will it be like the breakfast?”

  She knew I was referring to the pedestal. She swallowed and nodded. “Just do as you are expected and everything will run like clockwork.” Her false enthusiasm intensified the anxiety inside me.

  “Do I have a choice?”

  Her brow puckered, her age instantly showing on her worried face. She didn’t answer my question but she didn’t have to. We both knew that I definitely didn’t have a choice.

  She held up a beautiful deep red dress with a hopeful smile. “Look how pretty this is, Mae. You will look stunning.”

  I nodded faintly. “I suppose there’s underwear to match. If you can call it underwear.” I knew I would have to wear the bloody half-knickers that were expected last time.

  “Yes. And please wear them this time. You could have gotten Master into a lot of trouble if your last ensemble had been witnessed.”

  I rolled my eyes at her. “Oh we can’t have Master getting into trouble, can we?”

  She gave me a worried glance, her brow pinched and a slight tightening to her lips. “Please, as much for your benefit as his. Master Robert will be at tonight’s celebrations. Don’t anger him any further Mae, please.”

  I presumed Master Robert to be Master’s father. I nodded, understanding completely that what he had done to me had probably only been a portion of what he could deliver. I had never met anyone as cruel and twisted as him and I was adamant I didn’t want to meet his violent side again.

  “Fine.”

  She smiled widely at me, relief in her eyes. “Come, let’s get you ready. I’ll make you look pretty.”

  I huffed as I climbed from the bed. “Yeah, good luck with that.”

  ~~~

  I stood staring at the door as Pauline flustered around me, her nervous fiddling with sections of my hair irritating me. “Pauline, please, it’s fine. In fact it’s perfect.”

  My chest tightened as my stomach clenched with nerves. I couldn’t pinpoint why but I knew something big was to happen behind the door to the room where Master and I had shared a bottle of expensive whisky. Call it premonition or just plain instinct, it didn’t matter, I just knew deep in my soul that that night would change many things.

  The door opened and Master stepped out. The tightness in my chest at the sight of him was both comforting but confusing. His handsome familiarity and strength gave me a sense of protection but the way his stare hardened cautioned me.

  “Master?”

  He pursed his lips and straightened his spine, both actions intending to remove our new relationship. Whatever had happened whilst I had been out of it had taken away his compassion and replaced it
with a deep-seated disgust. The way his cold eyes roved over my body and the small sneer that crafted his mouth made me realise our friendship was over.

  I was angry with him but at the same time I understood why. I knew his father had been as cruel to him over his leniency with me as he had been to me. However, I was more upset that he had just dropped our mutual understanding of each other without fighting for what he actually wanted. Or maybe this was what he wanted and I had just misread the signals he had given off.

  He had admitted that there was something about me that made his usual cruelty veer off towards something warmer. Even if he hadn’t understood what it was, I had. So the fact that he had once more allowed the bitterness to consume him and destroy what little hope he’d had of redemption disappointed and hurt me.

  He stepped towards me, causing me to stiffen. He narrowed his eyes. I could sense the change in him and I preserved what little dignity I had left by shutting him out as much as he had closed himself off to me.

  “It is imperative that you behave tonight, Mae.” He turned to Pauline. “Did you make sure she was obedient in my choice of underwear?”

  Pauline nodded. “Yes, Master.”

  He nodded. “Thank you. You may leave.” I was surprised Pauline didn’t curtsey before she hurried away.

  Master turned back to me, his eyes once again studying my figure in the silk red dress he had requested I wore for him. His tongue snaked across his lips, dampening them as his gaze dropped to look at my tiny feet slotted into the ridiculously high red heels.

  He tipped his head as he lifted his eyes back to my face. “You look very beautiful. Thank you for your cooperation tonight.”

  I snorted loudly and shook my head. “Cooperation, Master? I think we both know it is nothing to do with cooperation. Cooperation suggests that you allow yourself to aid the person that needs help. And come on, whether or not I want to assist, you demand it of me.”

  He glowered at me, his chest heaving in anger. His fingers gripped my chin, bruising my tender jaw under his punishing hold. “Not tonight, Mae. I will not stand for your rebellion.”

  I locked my jaw defiantly, silently telling him that whatever pain he inflicted, I would take it and refuse to let it destroy me. “Oh you needn’t worry, Master. I gather my buyer is here tonight and the last thing I would want to do is put him off. The last thing we both want is to be stuck with each other.”

  His eyes widened at my outburst but his fingers dug into my cheeks so he could pull my face close. The spiteful smirk on his face made my heart thud precariously. “I wouldn’t worry about that too much, lamb. The loser doesn’t get to stay behind either.”

  The way he said it, full of unspoken promise, surged dread through every single fibre of me. “What do you mean? What happens to the loser?”

  He barked out a tight laugh. “Tell me, Mae. What happens to other pawns in a game when they don’t make it to the end square?”

  “I don’t understand….”

  “Oh, come on. You understand perfectly. Pawns that provide no value to the game are disposed of. They are of no use when the other game piece has won.”

  I gawped at him. “No…”

  His expression changed suddenly, sadness and regret creeping over the hatred that previously possessed him. “I’m afraid that’s how this game works, little lamb. I told you I would lead you to your slaughter… alive or dead.”

  “But Lola?”

  He lifted his chin to look me in the eye and shook his head. “Her current bid level is far below yours. I’m afraid her end is as near as yours.”

  “But that’s stupid. Why? I’m dead in a few weeks anyway. She may as well win the game. I’m of no use.” My fingers grabbed at his shirt as I fought for Lola’s life. “I’m dead anyway. Does my buyer know that?”

  “He does.”

  “And yet he chooses to still bid? How bloody stupid is he?”

  He seized the tops of my arms in both hands, his grip firm and unyielding as he shook me slightly. “Mae, calm down.”

  “What? How can you even…?”

  His thunderous expression fixed on me as he hissed out his next words. “Some people are twisted. They desire the possession of something… unusual. How the hell do you think snuff films are made, Mae?”

  My whole world crumbled around me. I was to be purchased to create a snuff movie. “Oh my God.” I suddenly struggled to breathe. “Please, Master. Oh God, no you can’t let them…”

  His palm fired heat across my cheek, the sting from my tears intensifying the pain. “Enough!”

  The door opened once more and Master Robert stood glaring at the pair of us. “Is there some sort of problem, Daniel? Does your subject require further discipline?”

  I couldn’t remove my eyes from Master Daniel as I begged him to help me. He refused to acknowledge me as he kept his face on his father. “No problem, Father. We were just discussing a few regulations about behaviour tonight.”

  My body had shifted into shock. I couldn’t move from beside my Master. Sensing my incapacity, he curled his arm around my waist to support me as he led me into the room behind his father.

  Chapter Seventeen

  ‘Help is a hindrance.’

  I didn’t look around the room as we entered. I couldn’t focus on anything past what Master had just divulged. Horrific scenes played out in my head, movies already in the making inside my sick, twisted imagination.

  Pressure built within my body, turmoil and grief overriding my system. I needed relief; I needed the serenity that only a blade could provide.

  I pondered on the idea of misbehaving, knowing that would bring on Master Robert’s wrath before an opportunity arose to open my veins and release some of the harrowing agony coursing through me.

  I climbed up onto the podium without a second thought. I allowed Master to direct me. The only thing I could concentrate on was the fill and emptying of air into my lungs.

  I heard him tut at my unladylike scale of the plastic tower but I wasn’t even sure how to climb the damn thing with any elegance.

  Lola shifted on her pedestal beside me. I turned to her but she remained transfixed, her gaze on nothing even though her eyes locked on something. “Lola, hi.”

  She didn’t acknowledge me. I hissed when Master’s fingers dug into my shin. “You will remain quiet throughout the dinner. You will speak only when spoken to and you will submit to any order given by any of my guests tonight. Is that understood?”

  I slowly turned my eyes from Lola to him, scoffing in disgust as I looked at him with hatred. “Why not just end me now?” I rolled my eyes and huffed dramatically. “Oh sorry, I forgot. How silly of me, I’m worth a little more alive than I am dead. You can’t film a slaughter if the main character is already dead.”

  He swallowed heavily as though my words hurt him. I winced when he exhaled and leaned into me, his fingers straightening out my dress that wasn’t even creased. I realised he was making it look to the others as though he was preparing me for their liking. “I’m going to do something that I have never done before, Mae.”

  I frowned at him but looked down at my dress, lowering my hands to smooth out the material with him whilst he covertly spoke to me. “There is a reason I need you to behave.” He paused, making sure he had my full attention. “It seems your purchaser likes your unruly behaviour. The reason for your high bid is because he apparently likes a woman with a bit of bite and fight. You are perfect material for the type of film he wants to make.”

  I tried to swallow the gasp that was fighting its way up my throat.

  “Do you understand what I’m telling you, lamb?”

  “Yes,” I whispered as quietly as I could. I pulled the ribbon that doubled as a belt into a straight bow. “Yes, I understand Master.”

  I jolted slightly when his fingers skimmed over mine, the pad of his thumb tickling along the edge of my own. “Let’s start to drop those fucking bids, little lamb. Always trust the shepherd who tries to protect you
. It’s not just his job, it’s his…”

  “Daniel?” Master Robert barked from across the room, his stern voice jerking us both from our own private moment.

  I gave him a small nod of understanding before he turned back to his father.

  I finally looked at my surroundings. The room was as I remembered but with a few more furnishings. Mine and Lola’s podiums were positioned against the back wall on full display for the guests. The sofas had been pushed against the other walls and a large rectangular dining table sat in the centre of the large room. Place settings for six had been formally placed, each row of cutlery telling me there were five courses to be served.

  Numerous people hovered around the room, talking amongst themselves. Master Daniel and Master Robert were deep in conversation with two elderly gentlemen and the Demi-whore was flirting with a man whose back was to me. I curled my lip at the way she expertly played him. The way she flicked her hair, the way she frequently touched his arm and giggled and genuinely seemed interested in him showed me just how much of an expert at seduction she was. But hey, weren’t whores supposed to be good at their jobs?

  “Gentlemen,” Master announced. “If you would care to take a seat, dinner is ready to be served.”

  I roved my eyes around the room as they all shifted into position. Soft music played in the background providing a lighter atmosphere than what they were actually here for.

  “It’s about time!” one of the stout older men barked, causing both Lola and I to jump in surprise. “I’m rather eager to get to dessert.”

  My breath stilled when he looked over at me, a revolting leer curling his fat pink lips. A shiver rocked through me as I regarded him with disgust. His small grey eyes devoured me as his tongue ran along one of the flabby slugs under his moustache, wetting it and triggering a wave of nausea.

  “Well, fuck,” I whispered to Lola. “If he’s mine I’m gonna pop myself off before he even gets the chance.”